Balikpapan

I finally got internet connection!

Haven't really been happening here, but looking at the way things are going on here makes me appreciate what I really do have there in Singapore.

I realised it is due to the easy accessibility to entertainments that keeps me in continual distraction back in Singapore. It is precisely that, that am not able to entertain the free moments to stand dazed or in imagination, being here gives me all the time in the world to dream and think about things.

Been pretty much a liability to my cousin, feeling really handicapped being so dependent, even a 5 mins walk away to a mall requires "protection". I often think we couldn't do much in Singapore (don't we always eat when out with friends?) Down here, you can't even eat out and hang around! Even having money here doesn't give me any avenue to spend...Little wonder now, the way Indonesians spend in our Orchard Road. *Mental note: I will make a commitment to give her more time attention when I get back to Singapore, for all the effort she has really put in to make me comfortable.

Visiting family, seeing the family home, soaking up the environment, I guess my dad had a really exciting time to grow up as a child. Sometimes I zoom by watching the natives sit dazed outside their home, wondering if they ever knew of the world beyond theirs, and in complete amazement how they could be in that state, just... sitting stoned the whole day watching the world go by...

I constantly think of you too, and that's so awful because when to finally part for real, it would be more painful. And that's precisely why I added fullstops back then.